Epedemic

I teach 2nd grade.

Within the first 2 days of school, three of my students had legitimate bloody noses. Unfortunately, this seems to have started a trend. Now, my students have developed the habit of randomly getting up, running to the kleenex box, yanking out tissues by the fistful, and trying to shove as many of them up their nose as possible. Whether they have seen any blood or not.

After I realized we had decimated 5 boxes of tissues in 3 weeks, I put my foot down.

I'm not sure what triggers the desire to race madly to the tissue box, but I think it's going around.

Now, if only the kids who have boogers running down their faces would catch on to the trend.

Womanatee

I went to Sea World with my family a few years ago. It was there that I discovered my rather inexplicable fascination with...

MANATEES!

Okay, so they are not the most exciting animals, but when I watched them sail through the water like giant swimming blimps, I couldn't help myself. I started envisioning a huge manatee tank in my backyard. I could feed them heads of cabbage, and try to hang onto them as they turn over in the water. It's like swimming with the dolphins but in slow motion.

For the record, if I had a pet manatee I would name him Fatty Lumpkin.

But since I cannot afford a manatee, I decided that I would have to sponsor one instead.

One step closer to my dream, baby.